train snob tactical mission

Posted: 14/04/2011 by B in random

Morning fans. Today I will admit something, I am not a morning person, and therefore, if you see me on the train I probably won’t acknowledge you, and if I do notice you, I will most likely keep my head down, unless you are someone really close to me like, my wife, my mum, Angelina Jolie, etc; I like mornings in the way of a nice walk during sunrise with the iPod flooding my head with sounds, but random chatter, that’s not for me.

I am so bad at this, I now have developed tactics after doing some reconnaissance over the period of a month. The carriage I normally get on, there is this girl which I am 90% sure of that I went to school with, though the last time I spoke to her was at school. If I engage in conversation, perhaps I will have to do this every morning, which I can see plenty of silent awkward moments, and what if that 10% chance she is in fact not that friend is correct, I will feel like a tool. Something else I learnt, she waits till most people exit the carriage before getting up and exiting and she sits near the door, and therefore, I stay in my seat, normally up/down stairs until I have to run out to just make the exit.

After a month of doing stealthy entries and exits to and from this carriage, I decided to try another carriage 2 up from my regular. Alas, another person I know is a regular to this box of steel, “Mushati”. A guy from work that I sometimes have lunch with that you may see regularly appear on our posts, but like I said, I am not a morning person. I learnt from the art of Ninja stealth vision, that he goes to the directly to the door before arriving at the station and is one of the first to exit and go straight up the escalators.

My tactic. Take the carriage between these 2, knowing “Mushati” exits quick, if I exit in the second row of people exiting my carriage, he will get up the escalator before spotting me, and therefore I will not be seen. The girl which is in the carriage behind me, is slow to get out, so I will get up the escalators before being seen by her following my second row stance. These are now the rules I will abide by for the rest of my life.

My mission this morning – “COMPLETE”


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